  Music in my head: it's way too late.......to be this locked inside ourselves...the trouble is......that you're in love with someone else......it should be me. oh, it should be me. ok, i started this post at 1:54 PM July 28th, 2004....but yeah i never exactly finished....let alone get started...though i've tried, it's been what? about 2-3 days now? and amazingly enough i've got the same song stuck in my head so i figured i'd go on.... yeah the same exact song is stuck in my head except now it's a different part: oh, how i love you, in the evening, when we are sleeping... well curiosa has come and gone, and all the drama of the past few days has subsided....i promised ashley that i would write all about curiosa in my blog...but i think i'll just tell her about it...for some reason i'm not totally in the mood to talk about it at the moment. i'm sure jordan probably wrote about it in her blog...and our accounts will most likely be similiar, save one small detail, ahem *coughfakerobertsmithcough* what i do feel like saying is that i've been strangely emotional lately.
it's so unlike me. not that i'm like a cold person or nething. it's just that recently little things will set me off. i mean there was a period not even that long ago that i couldn't cry when someone i knew died. and now it's like my daddy yelled at me *bawl* what the fuck? we've gone through worse.
i don't know what made this nething special. it was hard on him too.... and it was the stupidest thing today...i'm watching princess diaries ( i movie i'm not a fan of but i noticed the guy in it was kind of attractive sooo ) and at the end of the movie there's that staged little kissing scene, and i felt like crying my eyes out and throwing something at the TV saying "i want to be in love!!!! " *pouts and crosses her arms* heh. and again, it's not like i haven't been bitter before. but i don't recall the last time i was that strongly affected by it. afterall this is an ongoing fucking thing.
and i thought i was handling it all so well. i don't know. maybe it will pass soon. i hope so. i don't like being this way. i remember when it was all weird and i couldn't cry when things happened to me, though i really wanted to .... but then if i watched a movie i would...especially armaggedon...oh what that movie does to me... gheeawd.
aaaannnndddd now i'm home along. because i refused to attend this pointless gathering with my father and that sibling of mine. and i don't know what to do. i'd call someone, but who? i don't know if i've got nething to say. it's that awful mood.
grr. hmm...i'm sure there's some law and order marathon on....i could busy myself with it perhaps. hah. i don't even feel like doing that. SEE! i told you.
it's weird. but everything's supposed to be fine. i even said that...not but a week ago. i'm such a strange mofo. but i guess i will leave now. 
