  If I could pick one movie to portray my workplace it would be Office Space. If you haven’t watched it, I suggest you drop everything and go rent it. I’ve worked in a lot of different environments, but I’ve never experienced so much bureaucracy and confusion in one place. Most chaos can be attributed to our owner’s habitual nature of changing job duties and authority on an almost weekly basis. At this point in time I am the poor fool in charge. This will last until someone else has some bight idea on making the company profitable or until our fearless leader gets pissed off at me again. Either way, I’ll accept this mission and be happy that I’m not currently on his shit list. Our office is made up of a variety of annoying personalities, one of which, a man I like to Mr. Limp Dick. He possesses the most annoying personality of all. He wanders around the office aimlessly, putting his nose into everyone’s business, and tries to convince us all that he is the office manager.
In reality, he is nothing more than a brown noser and tattletale. He possesses absolutely no leadership skills what so ever and is unable to handle any forms of pressure being bestowed upon him. I’m not complaining about his inability to lead, because this company would be the next titanic if he were in charge. It just kills me that people like himself, one of the special people, have brainwashed themselves into thinking that they know shit, when they don’t know jack.
I’m thinking that the majority of his malformed personality stems from the fact that he inhabited his parent’s house until the age of 40. I also have the pleasure of working with Amnesia Man, another delusional personality, who makes my day almost unbearable sometimes. He was sane at one time, yet here we have another man whose mind was fucked up by a woman or should I say by her rejection of him and his momma’s boy tendencies. I would really feel sorry for this pathetic soul if he didn’t piss me off all the time. I have never known anyone who could fuck everything up beyond recognition in the half-hour between him and I coming into work. I depart in the evening and everything is chronic bliss and I arrive in the morning to nuclear meltdown and upon questioning his actions, he remembers nothing of his foolhardy demise.
I just really hate it when I am trying to take a proactive approach and trying to make things flow more efficiently, and I have to step back and react to an unneeded disaster and waste of time. It wouldn’t bother or surprise me so much if he wasn’t at one time a great guy to work with, but he’s inevitably lost his mind.
Picture a grown man, in just a diaper, curled up on the floor, sucking his thumb and you would understand my frustrations. Six months ago, I would have complained about working with women. However, we are now only graced by one female presence. You can all say what you want, but when you have two or more women working together in a small office, there is bound to be trouble. Don’t get me wrong, when they were friends all was well, but women are always conspiring against each other. I would get one day of peace and then act as a mediator the next. I finally got fed up with these frequent occurrences and let the claws fly.
Needless to say we no longer have the afternoon catfights. Anyway, though this place drives me crazy on a daily basis and I’m constantly scanning the web for new employment, I do realize that no workplace exhibits an aura of perfect harmony. I have accepted this hell for the time being only, because of the experience and knowledge that I might gain and who knows one day I might be the all-knowing one. 
