  By: Mariel Calalo I am 25 years old, an NBSB-ANP (No Boyfriend Since Birth, Alpha No Papa). Always the friend, never the girlfriend. Yup that's me. I guess I am still caught up with my idea of what is ideal, the boyfriend from Utopia. I guess we all want love to come along, it's just that we dictate the package it should come along with. When I was 20, I only asked God for 10 "Must-Have" Traits I'm looking for in a boyfriend.
I like to keep things simple because I think it's much easier for God to answer my prayers with a YES, if what I asked for is simple! Here goes my top 10 back then, in no particular order, with my not-so-brief rationale for each. Brace yourself. 1. HE SHOULD BE A FRIEND . I don't believe in the traditional "courtship" our parents knew.
I'd like to see a person in the raw, how he truly is. To watch him grow and just be himself. No pretenses. None of the sugar coating. By being friends first, I'd see all the good and the bad in him. And should the friendship be brought to a different plane, then I know what I would be plunging myself into and loving the good and bad in him won't be that difficult to do.
Perhaps, being patient and understanding would be much easier to do. 2. HE SHOULD LOVE AND RESPECT HIS OWN MOTHER AND SISTERS . The best way to see, I believe, to see how he would treat you is to see the way he treats his mom and his sisters. It takes practice to be tender and gentle and I would very much rather if he cultivates these traits by practicing with his mom and sisters. To understand women means to be educated by women.
3. HE SHOULD KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN . Imagine how boring life would be if I would end up with a person who only thinks about work. Imagine how life would be like with a person who works even through the weekends. I need somebody who knows how to have fun and knows how to laugh hard. Laid back kinda guy, low key and yet driven.
I don't intend to be with an irresponsible ball and chain, but I also don't want to be with a total bore who's highly intellectual but cannot function in the world where normal people live. 4. HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE ME LAUGH AND SMILE. I'm not looking for a clown in a million. I'm not looking for someone who looks so funny I can't help but laugh. I guess what I'm trying to say is that, help me be a happy person.
No one can ever make you a happy person but yourself, however, it helps having someone positive and cheerful around. 5. HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO SURPRISE ME WITH SMALL THINGS. I guess, I'm not the kind who gets surprised by a diamond ring, or chocolates, or roses. It's the small unexpected gestures that I cherish. Things like carrying my laptop because it's so heavy, asking me if I want water on a really hot summer day, or buying me my happy meal (congee+raddish cake) on a really, really bad day.
I need to be with a person with whom I constantly discover something new everyday. I don't need expensive stuff... I think I can afford those things. All I need is somebody who surprises me with small things... Small things that would make me say "Now, that's my boyfriend! " 6. SOMEBODY WHO WOULD GLADLY GO TO CHURCH WITH ME.
Catholic or otherwise, it doesn't really matter for as long as he believes in God and has a personal relationship with him (in layman's term, he prays). 7. HE SHOULD BE FINANCIALLY RESPONSIBLE . Between a rich kid and a financially responsible guy, I'd choose the second one. A rich guy who's not financially responsible ends up penniless because he doesn't understand what his financial priorities should be. I don't want to be in love and in debt all at the same time, I guess.
8. HE SHOULD DO THE BEST JOB HE KNOWS HOW TO DO. Of course no one wants to be with a bum. I just want to be with somebody who has a pleasant attitude towards his work. I need to be with a person who will make me appreciate my work too. 9.
A MAN OF INTEGRITY. Mabigat ata ito. Mahirap hanapin. I guess, I want someone who does what he says and means what he says. 10. LAST AND CERTAINLY NOT THE LEAST, CHUBBY, FAIR, CHINITO AND NEARSIGHTED.
A difficult combination no. Pag yan talaga tinamaan ni Lord, baka hindi lang ako Sunday mag-church, pati Tuesday and Thursday. Why Chubby? I certainly don't want to feel like a make-over project just because he's so vain. Why Fair? Aba iba na ang maputi.
Period. Chinito and nearsighted? Don't you just love and hate a moment when a guy's eyes turn into slits as his dimples gloriously show, as the walls of your emotional defenses melt. Ito lang ang logic diyan, ang pangit naman kung may boyfriend ka nga di ka naman kinikilig. The best example I can think of is RJ Ledesma and Robert Chien. = ) Today, at 25, I think hitting 10 out of 10 is like winning the Lotto, 93 million pesos, tax free.
Hitting 9 out of 10, is a wonderful blessing. 8 out of 10 is still a wonderful thing to contemplate. 0 out of 10 means, it must be LOVE! 
