  A long long time ago, when I was in the 7th grade, I read Orwell's urlLink 1984 . My young mind had plowed through many books, but never had a single book terrified me quite like this. The stomach pains and heartache I felt when Winston yells out, urlLink "Do it to Julia! stayed with me for weeks. As a 7th grader, I didn't read the book for its political warnings; it was the story that mattered. Like many an adolescent boy I was a hapless romantic, thinking that love was the strongest and purest of the emotions.
At the beginning of the book Winston receives a urlLink note from the girl with the dark hair. Maybe that was it...she passed him a simple handwritten message...like school kids. I rooted so hard for them. They were in a forbidden relationship, fighting the system with their hearts (and bodies. ) I knew they would escape and be together. Every book that I had ever read--except those dealing with the urlLink Alamo --had a happy ending.
There was the shock of their urlLink capture , but I still held out hope. There was plenty of book left. I knew O'Brien had a role to play in this. The dramatic tension built and I was trapped--like the child I was--in it. Completely hooked. After he betrayed Julia, I was still green enough to believe that the moment they saw each other the passion would rise up in each of them and erase the effects of their torture.
They would embrace, kiss, beg forgiveness of each other and escape. That didn't urlLink happen . I cried like a baby the rest of that day. I felt sick for at least a week. The reading of 1984 produced a couple of watershed moments in my life. My libertarian streak started then, though I had no idea what libertarian meant.
And my romanticism became cynical...something I'm still trying to overcome. "Under the spreading chestnut tree, I sold you and you sold me..." No imbibing of Victory Gin here. No betrayals. No 2+2=5. I'm just attempting to blog about things that have affected me over the past 40 years. Maybe I'll learn something.
********* Oh, btw, here's one of life's little ironies, I joined the military in 1981. Served in the US Air Force for over five years. My first assignment found me living in a dormitory in Hawaii. My room number? urlLink 101 . I laughed.
My roommate didn't get it. 
