  Today would have been our daughter's 5th birthday. Most people would be busy in their morning getting the house decorated for the party, rushing to the grocery store for the cake and other food to be served, dreading the appearance of 10-20 other 4 and 5 year olds and charging up the camera to capture it all. I'm not having a party, going to her grave or doing anything special to celebrate this day. Some would question "why?
" and it is because her death was the single most tragic event in my life and I refuse to celebrate it. Visiting the covered hole where she was buried will only bring back feelings that I have tried so hard to forget. I will never fully forget the events but it helps me not to relive them in full color memory often. ~~I'll write more later 
