  Friday, July 09, 2004 This is from mytrafficnews.com. My mom and I thought it was Hee-Haw-Highlarious! Enjoy... Gobble Gobble Friday: The best way to spend the last few minutes (or hours) of a holiday-shortened week, we think, is to goof off.
Hey, goof off with us, as we take a jaunt through what's going on that might tie up traffic tonight. Get comfy; there's a lot going on. First, there's the 12th Annual LoDo Music Festival, blocking off 20th through 22nd Streets from Blake to Larimer next to Coors Field today and tomorrow. Today's music starts at 5 p.m., and the official site warns against bringing such things as cans, fireworks and turkey legs.
You heard them, people, NO TURKEY LEGS! C-470 and Morrison Road could be packed during the rush hour because of a 5:30 p.m. show at Red Rocks with The Allman Brothers Band and String Cheese Incident. By the way, both are "jam bands" which means this concert will probably be about 9 songs and 47 drum solos in only 7 or 8 hours. Whoo! Turkey legs are OK, but only from free range turkeys. Meanwhile, the Amphitheater on Fiddler's Green Parkway will host the Colorado Symphony Orchestra, as they play the music of Led Zeppelin starting at 7 p.m.
If the Internet is to be believed, this really is happening. Next week a banjo and bagpipe band play the music of Ice-T. OK. We made that one up, but it seems about as likely.
Cornish Game Hen legs are OK, but no turkey legs. Sorry. But wait, there's more! The Pepsi Center not only has Cirque de Soleil in the parking lot at 4 and 8 p.m., but Women of Faith are in the Can itself, starting at 7 p.m. Don't expect all the typical swearing as attendees scramble for the last parking space that will actually fit an SUV. But watch for a lot of grit teeth and a growl of "I'm going to PRAY for you SO DARN HARD! " Whole turkeys -- if very, very flexible -- are allowed at the cirque, and for the faith event, well, you can bring whatever food you want as long as you promise to send us the recipe and it's OK if you used Miracle Whip because we can't cook without it either.
Most of these events repeat tomorrow, with one addition: John "I'm a turkey leg at heart" Fogerty plays tomorrow at Universal Lending Pavilion. We mentioned this yesterday, and a MyTrafficNews family member wrote in and thought our "secret code" was another lame joke.
It's not! Click the link below and enter the secret code COACHF in the Special Promotions window; you can get one or two tickets for only the service charges. Another reader wrote in and said that Fogerty is great, but he's excited to see the other act on the bill: Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers. "Nothing like songs about tequila," he writes, "and, well, more tequila! " Except maybe a Turkey Leg ballad. We're excited about the show, and we're not sure what the rules say, but we're bringing turkey legs. They can have our turkey legs when they pry them from our cold, wrinkled up hands! And even then we'll keep all that yummy seasoning and the juices that drip on our hand! So there! If you have a fear of crowds, hide in your closet and eat turkey legs until the weekend is over.
Otherwise, get out and have some fun; there's plenty to be had. We'll either see you Saturday night at the Fogerty show, or right here Monday afternoon. Until then, thanks for reading! 
