  ok. 4th blog. my weekend with will was spoil me. seriously. to the point where i feel guilt. i am not used to someone wanting to do all that stuff for me. it was a lovely weekend. nothing like laying around eating drinking and being in one of my top three places to see.
the fact that i was there meant more than anything you know. i have to remember to thank him for that. i keep updating in this thing soley cause i like the template. shows how lazy i am. i sent andrew an email with the goings on of my life. of course he doesnt know it all but his response had the title "pensive". i didnt know how to take it. andrew's opinon weighs heavy on me. andrew does not like matt. andrew thinks will is using me.
both maybe true. one things for sure. i have to remind myself that i am going home and niether of these boys will be like..."no stay here" or "i'll come with you" i need to make this year a "boy vacation" year. however...i already know its gonna be a "jennifers sad" year. overall. my heart will be broken. when matt ditched out on me, i had a bad reaction. i would intentionally punish myself each time he ignored me, then i would repeat even though i knew he wouldnt.
on the other hand though, i knew that he would eventually deal with me. so i kept pushing. god i want pizza. and those cute shoes i saw at target. or targee as they seem to like to call it. curtis is in bed for being satan. cathy yelled at me for not spanking him. jonathan ames willbe on tv tonight. he'll be a dork and i will love him for it. 
