  I am listening to this old instrumental song by palchelbel, canon in d"  I used to listen to this song everyday when i was in Singapore.  This song was my companion when im ecstatic,  sad,  dissapointed,
 depressed.  a lot of memory. so when i listen to it again,  the memory just somehow come back to me.  when i woke up that morning to go to school,  i was so happy coz i know i was going to meet endi,
 then after school- shopping with yanti,  eating,  then coming back .  had dinner,  watched tv and then went to bed.
 what a paradise.  on saturdays,  woke up very late,  then answered misscalls in my hp,  went to orch to shop or movie with rock and yanti +  andy .
 hung out at cocca suki.  its really nice.  go crazy before o level,  watched movie before science paper.  had that who- cares attitude.
 then go crazy after o level.  the prom nite.  cried during prom nite.  everybody was suoper nice there,  even my arch enemy.  kinda miss her though.
hhehe.  3 months in indo was killing me.  boring.  this song was my only companion.  my parents were so busy,  they don't give a damn.
 then flew back to sg.  on valentine's day.  received a love letter from aussie( cool rite : P)  then had dinner and movie with louis.
 the days after that were the best of my life.  esp my b day.  he called me on 19th of feb to meet him in KS.  he played pool until midnight with a friend,  but he never ignored me.  he would sit beside me until his turn came.
 after that a walk home from ks to my condo.  we just talked and talked,  half way ppl were calling to say happy bday.  and louis was so depressed coz he was the first one to say it. hahha.  when we reached morningside,
 he decided to stay.  we talked in the swimming pool until two.  he forgot that he had school tmr.  he was late the next day while i woke up early in the morning realising that this song was playing the whole night.  louis asked me out everyday.  crazy rite.
 oh yah.  on the 21 of feb,  he asked me out around 7 while i was in pasir ris having reunion with my class mates.  i left there after 12 pm. reached orch abt 1.  then met him.
 we walked to gw but it was closed so we walked to singapore river.  he held my hand while we were joking.  we laughed so loud that the people there gave us dirty looks.  hahha.  we didnt care.  we walked holding hands.
 then he hugged me all the way home.  o level results' release.  i was so happy.  i never dreamt of becoming a top student.  happy.  then louis said he was so proud of me.
 oh yar.  the day before it,  i was so scared and he said " you will get gd grades.  if you got 11 pts i will give you a kiss"  and he did.
 on that day.  his first kiss.  at my house.  but time flies when we are having fun rite.  so there i arrived at the day when i was abt to depart to seattle.  we broke up.
 he said it was for the best,  long distance relationship was hard and stuffs.  gosh i cried,  there in front of him.  and he kept hugging me,  he said .
 nvm.  anyway.  thats how our relationship ended.  on the plane he called to say good bye and stuffs.  when i reached seattle.  i was cursing myself for not staying in sg.
 i still talked to louis online.  and on the phone.  but it was over.  he said he will go to seattle after o level and if the feeling was still there,  we will continue from there.  i was hurt.
 all my friends said that he made a gd decision and it was because he loved me.  long distance would affect my study as well as his o level.  i just kept quiet.  for a moment i thought i had lost my heart,  but there was something inside me breaking.  i tried not to call him,
 not to go online.  that time i though i was a living ghost.  numb and everything.  then i met kai.  on the bus.  he was gd looking and all.
 nice.  but we just couldn't click at all.  but yogi made us click.  hahah yogi was funny,  he tried hard for me and kai to get together.  when louis knew i've gotten myself a boyfriend.
 he sort of pissed.  he told his friends that.  he talked to me online.  but we knew it's time for us to move on.  i still love him so much though that time.  as for kai.
 i nevert really liked him except for his physical appearance.  he looks a little bit like louis;  the way he dresses,  walks.  but other than that.  he is far from louis.
 my relationship with kai wasnt that great.  coz i still loved louis but i treat him very good though.  i don't know.  then time passes. me and kai got better and better.  as in we start to understand each other and stuffs.
 he is nice and sweet at times.  me and louis don't talk online anymore( we used to talk everyday for hours for a year before we got together)  sad huh. if you ask me now whether i still love louis.  my answer will be i don't know.
 and if you ask me whether i love kai.  my answer will be i dont know as well.  i am bad huh?  may be that's why i treat him so good.  coz i feel guilty.  i don't know.
 the day i broke up with louis.  i was totally ruined.  i lost someone who always cared for me for the past 1 year.  someone who loved me no matter what.  someone who was extremely patient with me.  someone who pampered me so much that he spoilt me.
 someone who always listened.  i lost a boy friend as well as a best friend.  so here is my story.  a very long one.  gosh.  no matter how many times i tell my friends about this story.
 i thought by saying it out i am actually letting it go,  but it is still so heavy inside.  even after wrtting this out.  i dunno.  i still want to cry.  i still curse myself.
nvm.  what a girl yah?
