  I could say I have everything every girl wanted. A successful career, a loving family, a thoughtful boyfriend, and charming friends. Yet recently my faith was shaken. I could not accept the fact that I was given illness. Why me?
I have been faithful to you Lord; I have been an obedient child. I know I let you down sometimes but do I deserve this punishment? Isn’t it the cross that You have given is too much for me to bear? Can you blame me if I came to hate hearing mass or even the priests? Can you blame me if I stop believing You exist? I still remember when a beautiful nun first introduced us to each other in my pre-school. I shouted for joy, now I have a brother! Isn’t it I talked to you everyday? I visited the church every morning just to say hello or even the little things I wish to share with you, I utter a small prayer. I grew up loving you. I know I had pledged of becoming one of your servants when I was sixteen. I know I have broken that pledged when I fall in love… I remember 2 years ago You took care of me when I accidentally fell down the stairs in Malaysia.
I only got bruises and scratches though my head hurt terribly. My friend wanted me to go to a hospital but I pleaded not. I just took pain relievers for several months and pray a lot. Alas, during my illness last year my head had been checked and for me it’s a real miracle that the lab shows no abnormalities. **Sigh** Well my illness is not life threatening and it is treatable yet here I am hating You. I’m sorry. Help me Lord to carry this cross. Help me to endure the pain emotionally. And thank you for still being there in spite of everything. 
