  I just fell in love with Brennan Manning,  author of The Ragamuffin Gospel and Ruthless Trust .
nbsp;  His followers were mine as a younger " christian, nbsp;  Michael W.  Smith as a teen,  and more importantly,  Rich Mullins as an adult. nbsp;  Rich came to San Antonio frequently when I was doing the Baptist thing. nbsp;  I'll never forget one night when he played and my mom and I were there. nbsp;  It had to be at least ten years ago,
 and I honestly have no idea why only Mom and I ended up at this event.  It was her birthday.  I watched and somehow decided that in heaven,  I'd be married to someone like Rich,  because he GOT it.
nbsp;
 He understood the way that Christ was about.
nbsp;
 And he'd be a good husband.
nbsp;
 I literally coveted Rich Mullins' existence.
nbsp;
 ( though I was married with three kids at the time and didn't have his existence.
 Ok,  so of course,  there's some weirdness about that.
nbsp;
 But I really lusted after Rich in the most spiritual of ways.
nbsp;
 I just wanted him to be my husband and then everything would be okay.
nbsp;
 (
Mom,  at that time,  wanted me to marry Carmen,  but that's another blog.  So later,  I&
nbsp;
used my " Christian connections"  and got us into the Christian bookstore " afterparty"
 and he came in and as he was exiting after a ten minute acoustic thing,  and we passed him on the stairs.
nbsp;
 I screamed to him like I was a groupie and he was a Beatle,
 "
RICH!
nbsp;
 IT'S MY MOM'S BIRTHDAY!  He stopped and looked at me.
nbsp;
 I grinned charmingly and said,
 "
Pretty please,  could you sing her Happy Birthday?  He looked at me ( and with what&
nbsp;
I hope&
nbsp;
was wishfulness that I was his wife,
nbsp;
 sang it.
nbsp;
 Sweetly and with authenticity.
nbsp;
 And my mother was as thrilled as all get-
out.
nbsp;
 And I always loved him more for that.
 When I learned he died in a car accident,  I just ached.
nbsp;
 I even committed the mortal sin and actually " prayed"  to Rich on a regular basis when I was confused or lonely.  So fast- forward to today:
nbsp;
 I'm at Barnes and Noble picking up Brennan Manning's Ruthless Trust and was inadvertently directed by the store clerk to The Ragamuffin Gospel .
nbsp;
 And lo and behold,  there was a message in the forward by Rich,  And lo and behold,
 DUH,  this is why he's called his band The Ragamuffin Band .
nbsp;
 Good lord.
nbsp;
 Could it be I'm finding what I was looking for?
nbsp;
 Even if it's not being married to Rich?  I'm overwhelmed.
nbsp;
 Because guess what?
nbsp;
 Today is July 26.
nbsp;
 My Mom's birthday.
nbsp;
 No joke.
